Get ready, I’m going to lead you down a rabbit hole…
In my quest to get myself back into the habit of writing these blog posts with more regularity, I have been thinking a lot about what I want to share with you about Runaway Ridge and the progress we are making in its evolution. Note, please, that I did not say in achieving its completion. I’ve addressed the dreaded question of, “when do you think you all will be finished up there?”, before. The honest answer is, probably never. For although we want to get the house to the point where all the interior construction is done, final finishes are complete and rooms have been furnished and accessorized - there will always be projects (big and small) that are on our never to be completed “To Do List”. If those run out (highly unlikely), we’ll dream up other buildings or projects or tackle issues of upkeep and maintenance. And of course, there’s always the house in Annandale, which could really use some love (and energy and time and monetary investment).
I’m not one for making New Year's Resolutions. However, the beginning of the calendar year usually gives me pause to consider what was accomplished last year and what goals to set for the year to come. This often coincides with getting financial records organized in preparation for tax filing in April. Closing the books on the previous year gives me the opportunity to take a good hard look at where our time and money went! In 2023 we finally found the crew to apply the siding to the house on Runaway Ridge. This was our largest endeavor both in terms of time and money since the “weather-tight shell” had been completed in 2019. Interior construction continued with installation of the tile flooring on the main floor, installation of the kitchen, and detailing of the bedrooms on the upper floor. We also completed the bathroom on the upper floor and got the bathroom on the main floor functioning in time for the celebration we hosted in October. The “‘Til Death” party on Runaway Ridge in October and the Malibu wedding in November were undoubtedly the highlights of 2023. See more about that in my previous post titled Family Celebrations in 2023.
Jim and I basically took December off. We worked on small, fun projects on The Ridge but didn’t tackle much that felt pressured or intense (by our definitions). Last month we geared ourselves back up and, with the help of our ever faithful and committed friends, Rob & Kirsten, got the tile flooring installed in the Main Floor Great Room and Reading Nook.
During these last weeks of Winter, we’re budgeting our resources and making plans for the small, medium and large projects we want to complete up here in 2024. The biggest of these will be adding the decks and front porch to the house. Once the weather breaks we will lay out their shapes and sizes on the site, order materials and begin the construction process. In the meantime, we will patiently (or not so patiently) wait for Spring, and keep ourselves occupied with more interior projects. Speaking of patiently waiting -
Approaching the Rabbit Hole….
One of my biggest personal challenges throughout the process of owning and making improvements on Runaway Ridge is to be patient.
The definition of patience, according to the Oxford Dictionary, is the capacity to accept or tolerate delay, trouble, or suffering without getting angry or upset.
A quote from the website betterup.com gives some deeper insights into the “practice of patience”,
Patience is your ability to wait without becoming annoyed, upset, or angry. It's when you exercise self-control rather than lashing out and complaining. You're being patient when you take deep breaths and seek inner peace after things don't go the way you hoped. Practicing patience is all about how you act.
I fall short of my personal goal to practice patience on an ongoing basis.
Down the Rabbit Hole….
Considering the concept and practice of Patience led to my recollection of the phrase, “Patience is a Virtue.” This quote, according to several internet sources, is attributed to the English poet, William Langland as a part of his poem, called “William’s Vision of Piers Plowman” (published in 1360). I personally heard this phrase repeatedly from my Grandmother. She usually used it as a reprimand or a request for better behavior and temperament on my part.
What is a virtue? I like this synopsis from Wikipedia: “A virtue is a trait of excellence, including traits that may be moral, social, or intellectual. The cultivation and refinement of virtue is held to be the "good of humanity" and thus is valued as an end purpose of life or a foundational principle of being.” In other words, virtues are descriptions of behaviors that we can aspire to and which give our everyday decisions some moral guard rails and goals. If we all tried to live these principles, the world would indeed be a better place.
A little deeper investigation leads to Virtue Theory and Virtue Ethics, the sources of which are commonly accepted to have originated in Greek Philosophy. Socrates, Plato and Aristotle all wrote and taught about the subject. The Roman philosopher, Cicero, continued the consideration of the concepts. Needless to say, the list of philosophers engaging in and expanding this topic is long. Ethics and moral consciousness has been studied, debated and written about with great diligence of thought throughout the ages.
It’s kinda dark in here….
I have found many interesting versions of lists of virtues and their corresponding vices. Some are simple and others are very complex. They have been created by philosophers and theologians and many great thinkers of their times. Let’s just say that for every positive, there’s a negative. For every virtue, there’s a vice. The definitions of each virtue and vice, located at the opposite ends of their common scale, give us a spectrum upon which we can place our own behaviors to determine the merits of our thoughts, feelings and actions.
Here’s a list of virtues and vices based on the poem Psychomachia by Prudentius, written in the 5th century:
How do we get out of here?
So, my cursory investigation of the topic of the virtue of Patience led me down here. And I brought you along with me. I have concluded that trying to lead a virtuous life is an endeavor that calls for constant vigilance, self assessment and most importantly self control! Bigger minds than mine have found the topic, and the actual action of behavioral control, quite challenging. Therefore, I will simply continue to strive to “practice” the art of Patience. We’ll see if practice does indeed make perfect!
I think I can see daylight….
Why did I even take you through the twists and turns of this circuitous route of my thoughts? Because I wanted to share with you the challenge that it is to maintain Patience throughout the process of building a house. If you ever consider taking on this type of project, “pack your Patience”, because it will be tested over and over and over again. Let me give you a particular example of a test of my Patience.
Sometime late in 2019, as our General Contractor approached the completion of our “weather-tight shell”, Jim asked me to do some research regarding our floor tile. I enthusiastically agreed to take a trip to one of our local tile distributors. I would see what we could consider for the flooring material throughout the house. I spent the better part of a morning at this showroom. I took pictures of the tiles, their specification sheets, and their price lists. I was excited about the range of options and couldn’t wait to present all of my findings to Jim. In my defense, I didn’t think that the house would be ready for tile imminently, but I was anxious to find out what Jim’s timetable was.
That evening, I could hardly wait to start sharing my pictures with Jim. I began my presentation. After just a few swipes on my phone, Jim asked me to zoom in on one of the specification sheets. He carefully considered what he was looking at, handed me my phone and said, “Thanks, that’s all I needed.” I was deflated. The tone of his voice indicated that our conversation about tile was done. What had just happened? All he had wanted to know was what the average tile thickness was for all of the tiles I had looked at. That dimension was critical for our finished floor to floor dimension which had to be taken into consideration in the framing for the stairs. That’s all. We didn’t discuss floor tile again for at least the next year. And as you have noted in what I said we were working on as recently as this past January - 4+ years later, the floor tile installation throughout the house is still not quite complete.
Above Ground
Many of our friends and family have told me that I’m a patient woman. I don’t think I’m that virtuous. I have not held my temper or controlled my frustration or kept myself from complaining. I have had many times where I have screamed, cried, sulked or simply shut down in frustration due to the time that the process of creating this house is taking. Jim is patient. He is patient with me and with the process. He conducts himself with temperance and determination. I’m still just “practicing” Patience. I will say the payoffs are worth it. Keep checking in for more posts of recent accomplishments. I think you’ll agree that some things are/were well worth the wait.
